Thomas L. Friedman

Why We Need a Green Revolution - And How it Can Renew America

Thomas L. Friedman's no. 1 bestseller The World Is Flat has helped millions of readers to see globalization in a new way. Now Friedman brings a fresh outlook to the crises of destabilizing climate change and rising competition for energy—both of which could poison our world if we do not act quickly and collectively. His argument speaks to all of us who are concerned about the state of America in the global future.
Friedman proposes that an ambitious national strategy—which he calls "Geo-Greenism"—is not only what we need to save the planet from overheating; it is what we need to make America healthier, richer, more innovative, more productive, and more secure.
As in The World Is Flat, he explains a new era—the Energy-Climate era—through an illuminating account of recent events. He shows how 9/11, Hurricane Katrina, and the flattening of the world by the Internet (which brought 3 billion new consumers onto the world stage) have combined to bring climate and energy issues to Main Street. But they have not gone very far down Main Street; the much-touted "green revolution" has hardly begun. With all that in mind, Friedman sets out the clean-technology breakthroughs we, and the world, will need; he shows that the ET (Energy Technology) revolution will be both transformative and disruptive; and he explains why America must lead this revolution—with the first Green President and a Green New Deal, spurred by the Greenest Generation.
Hot, Flat, and Crowded is classic Thomas L. Friedman—fearless, incisive, forward-looking, and rich in surprising common sense about the world we live in today.

秀婷，你看完了沒？
Thomas L. Friedman
wikipedia.org/Thomas_Friedman

Philippe Starck

Renowned French designer Philippe Starck fed up with his job and going to retire in two years.

"Everything I designed was unnecessary."
The only objects that he still felt attached to were
"a pillow perhaps and a good mattress ... ... and the ability to love".

I can't post the news here because AFP has copyright for it. You can read more here. It is worth reading.

Read the transcript here | Download MP4

www.philippe-starck.com
wikipedia.org/Philippe_Starck

我的名字叫明志

原本沒有想要在這裡跟大家說我又開了一個新的 blog，但是因為最近台灣某家電視台已經播出這個新聞，所以想說既然已經公開了，那就讓更多人知道吧，反正我覺得這不是壞事。

2007/07/31 19:36
生活中心／綜合報導

族群問題在馬來西亞一直備受爭議，一名來自馬來西亞的僑生，將馬來西亞的國歌改編後放上網路，內容批評馬來西亞政府制度不公，打壓華人，引起馬國政府警告，甚至不排除對他提出告訴，現在這段影片在網路發燒，不少網友紛紛上網聲援，要馬來西亞政府別小題大作。

穿著黑色POLO衫手拿麥克風，唱歌的人是馬來西亞僑生，用RAP的方式改編馬來西亞國歌。

馬來西亞僑生：我愛我的國家．有國才有家．有家才有我．站在這邊跟你大聲唱歌你麥驚．雖然我每次罵粗話．我的歌就像榴槤一樣．硬硬尖尖只是」

歌名就叫「我愛我的國家Negarakuku」，乍聽之下沒什麼，不過仔細聽聽下面這一段。

馬來西亞僑生：我們的警察叫做MATA．因為他們的眼睛很亮．新年一到他們就很努力．拿住筆可是很會少跟你開單．因為他們口很渴需要喝茶．還有kpo要不要加糖．如果加糖．他嘴巴會甜甜跟你微笑．你要離開的時候」

歌詞中，黃明志對馬來西亞政府的不滿與抱怨毫不掩飾，不但用「還沒斷奶」來影射馬國土族接受當地政府的保護政策，對於馬來西亞的教育制度也沒忘了批判。

馬來西亞僑生：世界各地都會看到Malaysia的小孩．好像逃難一樣西北爽．2007馬來西亞搞觀光．獨中生政府根本不想管．文憑丟Longkang像我一樣．中化畢業去了台灣．學了東西準備回去報答國家．我站在台北路邊拿住Guiter．可是我的嘴巴還是一樣唱」

由於歌曲部分內容涉及國家形象問題，已經引起馬國政府注意，甚至有媒體指出，馬來西亞新聞局已經展開調查，並且不排除採取法律行動，現在這段影片在網路發燒，不少網友上網聲援，希望能藉由輿論呼籲馬來西亞政府，輕鬆看待年輕人的創意。

明志的 blog
http://www.ettoday.com/2007/07/31/91-2134590.htm

Andrew Carnegie 30歲

人生的 Plug n Play? 跟著卡耐基的腳步，成為成功人士？肯定不可能，但是看看參考也無妨？這樣的說法常常叫我無法認同。

Carnegie’s philanthropic inclinations began some time before retirement. He wrote;

I propose to take an income no greater than $50,000 per annum! Beyond this I need ever earn, make no effort to increase my fortune, but spend the surplus each year for benevolent purposes! Let us cast aside business forever, except for others. Let us settle in Oxford and I shall get a thorough education, making the acquaintance of literary men. I figure that this will take three years active work. I shall pay especial attention to speaking in public. We can settle in London and I can purchase a controlling interest in some newspaper or live review and give the general management of it attention, taking part in public matters, especially those connected with education and improvement of the poorer classes. Man must have an idol and the amassing of wealth is one of the worst species of idolatry! No idol is more debasing than the worship of money! Whatever I engage in I must push inordinately; therefore should I be careful to choose that life which will be the most elevating in its character. To continue much longer overwhelmed by business cares and with most of my thoughts wholly upon the way to make more money in the shortest time, must degrade me beyond hope of permanent recovery. I will resign business at thirty-five, but during these ensuing two years I wish to spend the afternoons in receiving instruction and in reading systematically!

卡耐基我不熟，太快批評又不好，還是有空好好閱讀好。
Project Gutenberg - Autobiography of Andrew Carnegie
Project Gutenberg - Round the World
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Andrew_Carnegie
綠色工廠 Easylife Blog :: 30歲以前不要去在乎的29件事

M.C.Escher

好久好久，我終於找到他了，M.C.Escher，她說他是數學家，原來如此。深深被 M.C.Escher 的才華吸引。天才都是左撇子，我不是。

Maurits Cornelis Escher (1898-1972) is one of the world's most famous graphic artists. His art is enjoyed by millions of people all over the world, as can be seen on the many web sites on the internet.

He is most famous for his so-called impossible structures, such as Ascending and Descending, Relativity, his Transformation Prints, such as Metamorphosis I, Metamorphosis II and Metamorphosis III, Sky & Water I or Reptiles.

But he also made some wonderful, more realistic work during the time he lived and traveled in Italy.

Castrovalva for example, where one already can see Escher's fascination for high and low, close by and far away. The lithograph Atrani, a small town on the Amalfi Coast was made in 1931, but comes back for example, in his masterpiece Metamorphosis I and II.

M.C. Escher, during his lifetime, made 448 lithographs, woodcuts and wood engravings and over 2000 drawings and sketches. Like some of his famous predecessors, - Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci, Dürer and Holbein-, M.C. Escher was left-handed.

Apart from being a graphic artist, M.C. Escher illustrated books, designed tapestries, postage stamps and murals. He was born in Leeuwarden, the Netherlands, as the fourth and youngest son of a civil engineer. After 5 years the family moved to Arnhem where Escher spent most of his youth. After failing his high school exams, Maurits ultimately was enrolled in the School for Architecture and Decorative Arts in Haarlem.

After only one week, he informed his father that he would rather study graphic art instead of architecture, as he had shown his drawings and linoleum cuts to his graphic teacher Samuel Jessurun de Mesquita, who encouraged him to continue with graphic arts.

After finishing school, he traveled extensively through Italy, where he met his wife Jetta Umiker, whom he married in 1924. They settled in Rome, where they stayed until 1935. During these 11 years, Escher would travel each year throughout Italy, drawing and sketching for the various prints he would make when he returned home.

Many of these sketches he would later use for various other lithographs and/or woodcuts and wood engravings, for example the background in the lithograph Waterfall stems from his Italian period, or the trees reflecting in the woodcut Puddle, which are the same trees Escher used in his woodcut "Pineta of Calvi", which he made in 1932.

M.C. Escher became fascinated by the regular Division of the Plane, when he first visited the Alhambra, a fourteen century Moorish castle in Granada, Spain in 1922.

During the years in Switzerland and throughout the Second World War, he vigorously pursued his hobby, by drawing 62 of the total of 137 Regular Division Drawings he would make in his lifetime.

He would extend his passion for the Regular Division of the Plane, by using some of his drawings as the basis for yet another hobby, carving beech wood spheres.

He played with architecture, perspective and impossible spaces. His art continues to amaze and wonder millions of people all over the world. In his work we recognize his keen observation of the world around us and the expressions of his own fantasies. M.C. Escher shows us that reality is wondrous, comprehensible and fascinating.

https://www.artsy.net/artist/maurits-cornelis-escher
http://www.mcescher.com/
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/M._C._Escher

The Man Who Shocked the World

Stanley Milgram
Behavioral Study of Obedience
Documentary filming of the Obedience experiment
CBC - THE HUMAN BEHAVIOUR EXPERIMENTS

David Icke

我一年前已經開始研究這個人，他是David Icke。我不想贅訴他是什麼人，但是如果你有想要了解這個世界（或稱為他看到的世界），他是一個管道。有興趣的人可以看看以下這幾個連結。

Wikipedia - David Icke
David Icke: Was He Right?
David Icke - secrets of the matrix pt 1
David Icke - secrets of the matrix pt 2
David Icke - secrets of the matrix pt 3
David Icke Homepage
David Icke - Infinite Love Is The Only Truth, Everything Else Is Illusion (ebook pdf)

還沒準備好的人，建議不要看，因為影片內容可能引起個體的焦慮與思想上的不適！

黃子華 棟篤笑

1.愛情

白雪公主，幾咁純潔無瑕。
但係諗真?，白雪公主，識得?個王子，
灰姑娘識?個又係王子，
有個有特殊嚐好，鐘意錫青蛙?女人錫?隻青蛙一啖，
隻青蛙變出??又係王子！
有冇人諗過根本個王子係同一個人呢?
根本呢個王子都不知幾花心，周圍溝女。
仲無良到扮青蛙去溝添！


2.情竇未開

?我第一次戀愛之前，我認為自己就係楊過，
而我同書?面個楊過唯一唔同?地方、就係佢有隻大鵰。
而我?陣、就鐘意撚呢個相思多?。
同楊過一樣，我從來冇諗過要考第一?。
我只需要愛情，只要搵到我?小龍女，
我就可以拋棄學業，退隱山林，搬入新界住。
但係我一定要住西班牙別墅，我唔住得村屋，我怕蛇蟲鼠蟻。
然後每個月至多出一次市區，不過我唔會逗留得耐，
問亞媽?完零用錢我就會番番入去。
冇錯，基本上、我由中一至中五都係?呢種咁超然?思想下度過。
當時學校最流行?辯論題目係：中學生應否談戀愛？
我認為，我地應該辯論?係『中學生應否讀書？』
而?我第一次戀愛之前，我?小龍女只需要一個條件，
就係靚，我知道我咁諗你好幼稚，
但當時我年紀小，唔知道原來身裁都好重要。


3.性

聖人話:『食色性也！』
食同色，好唔同！
一個人無論幾鐘意食，
會唔會比幾十蚊入戲院睇套『蒸氣騰騰小龍包』？
一個人無論幾鐘意食，
又會唔會為?望一舊冇包住?牛肉望到位車撞？


4.愛情

戀愛唔係PART-TIME，你唔可以話：『愛！做完咪走囉！』
戀愛係一盤生意，你要二十四小時諗住佢。
自己生意，冇所謂PART-TIME 正識。
人地放假或者過年過節，你更加要開OT添。
行花市啦行海旁啦睇戲食飯啦....
你有乜?競爭對手呢？
我冇競爭對手?！
你估你係專利巴士公司呀？
港巴都執?啦！
有冇考慮結婚？
咁就要向公眾交代，咁就即係上市啦！
所以，『中學生應否談戀愛』唔係問題、
問題係『人類應否有兩份全職工作？』
你再拍拖，需要知會你老闆：
『老細，我出面搵?份戀愛，
我真係好需要呢份戀愛?，
不過公司??我會照做，我兼顧到??。』
然後你老闆會話：
『咁你不如搵多份愛情，咪直情唔洗番呢分工囉


5.新鮮

依家?人溝女，對絛女最大?要係乜呀?
唔係靚，最緊要，係夠新鮮!
乜?叫做夠新鮮呀?
就係話、溝?一年?個，就唔夠溝?半年?個咁正。
因為半年?個新相識，新鮮?。
同樣，溝?半年?個，就唔夠三個月咁正。
溝?一個月就唔夠半個月?個咁正。
溝?一日就唔夠半日?個正，如此類推，終於...
溝??件，就唔夠未溝果件咁正！
咁即係點呢??
仲溝唔溝好呢?一溝就唔正?！

　
6.女人偉大

黃:係愛情之中,女人最偉大!
男人o既犧牲,就為o左追求美麗,
而女人o既犧牲,就只係得倒一個麻甩佬!
而最偉大既係佢地根本唔覺得係犧牲.
如果你話俾一個女人聽,喂,你男朋友有口臭!
張:車.人梗有局部缺點o既!
黃:佢仲有臭狐同香港腳喎!
張:咁佢咪好平均咯!
黃:佢鼻鼾聲好勁喎!
張:我男朋友一定係夢見我,我開心.
黃:佢屙尿亂o甘啡!
張:好壯呀!
黃:佢唔洗手喎!
張:邊有男人洗手o架!
黃:我有!
張:姆型!
黃:佢重講粗口呀!
張:但係佢心地好!
黃:佢係電梯度食煙喎!
張:公眾場合都唔俾食咯,佢咪呢埋一邊食囉,你地重想點呀!


7.責任何在?

如果你話我聽,因為我唔靚仔,所以唔可以做戲,
你唔應該話我聽!
因為唔關我事,我唔應該負呢個責任,你應該同我父母講,
係佢地攪成我咁o既.
如果你要罰,應該罰佢地.
以後,邊個醜樣,就罰佢爸爸,媽媽唔準做戲!
或者剩係做茄哩啡!
我唔係一個唔負責任o既人,為我爸爸媽媽果短短一剎o既快感,
我已經負責負o左廿幾年.
你估做我好易做呀?
我細個讀書唔好,或者唔合格,我冇要父母負責.
我自己簽晒o的成績表o既,
每當我爸爸媽媽有爭執鬧交o既時候,
我有冇叫佢地為o左我o既童年著想,忍下對方?
冇!
我叫佢地出街鬧!
我大個O左,唔知應該信邊個宗教,唔知做人為嘜,唔知人生事業o既方向都冇要求又母照顧我
反而係我調番轉頭,提醒佢地:
你地要搵錢呀,積穀防飢呀,唔係第日老來無依無靠呀!
嘜野都係我!


8.男仔唔駛靚仔

靚仔係唔係真係o甘重要呀?
有o的人話男人唔駛靚仔o既,有才華o米得囉.
係,你有冇試過帶你o既才華去落disco識女仔呀?
人地o的靚仔一行入去,唔洗二十分鐘,就已經同的女仔互相問問題:
[你度定我度?]
我帶住我o既才華入到去,幾難先搵到個女仔肯比個機會我.
唔係比機會我交換問題,而係比機會我天才表演.
唱歌跳舞做話劇講大話功夫表演,成套歡樂今宵一個人做一次......
　

9.演戲天份

我從小就知道,我係一個偉大既演員.
人地細個成班細路群埋,鐘意玩扮結婚,扮爸爸媽媽.
我細個,就鐘意扮姦夫淫婦.
但係唔知係o米我個樣比較老實,我係從來都無機會扮奸夫.
每次我都係扮淫婦......既老公.
雖然係o甘,雖然,我亦都係全班人之中最細個個.
但係我已經可以將一個妒忌o既男人心態表現得淋漓盡至.
當然,我的朋友個個都讚我,話我天生出黎,就係戴綠帽既.


10.死亡

細個o個陣,我係唔怕死o既.
我覺得,係以前o的人先會死o既.
係歷史書裡面o既人至會死.
好多人唔明歷史有嘜用,歷史o米話你聽邊o的人死o左囉.
我從來未睇過一本歷史書有提到黃子華呢個名,我點會死呀.
最緊要係,就算死都唔係嘜o野一回事.
細個o個陣隔離陳師奶成日叫佢老公:[咁多人去死你仲唔去死?]
然後去完番o黎,阿陳師奶又會話:[死番o黎勒,唔死多陣添?]
所以我一路都認為,去死,即係去街,同埋一定唔會去好遠.
因為阿陳生每次都好快就返黎o既.


11.愛情

白雪公主,幾甘純潔無瑕.
但係諗真o的,白雪公主,識得o個個係王子,灰姑娘識o個個又係王子,
有個有特殊嚐好,鐘意錫青蛙o既女人錫o左隻青蛙一啖,
隻青蛙變出黎o既又係王子!
有冇人諗過根本個王子係同個人呢?
根本呢個王子都不知幾花心,周圍溝女.
仲無良到扮青蛙去溝添!


12.泳池

黃:去公眾泳o個D唔係叫做游水,o個D叫做浸水.
因為係公眾泳池游水,只可以用一種泳式,
就係彈式,同一個位,彈下彈下.
張:如果係高手可以用式,但係要潛落水底o個度用.
黃:點解D泳池有咁多人?
張:唔好問呀,趁人多你好快浸下.
等陣所有人上晒水個陣,你就會發覺,
個池的水原來到膝頭哥o架o乍!
黃:其實我地香港人都習慣o左人多,去浸 o下水都好.
但係可惜o既係,呢D水,唔係一般水,呢D係暖水.
張:o下,o係度屙尿,o甘冇公德心!
由細到大我爸爸媽媽都教我,急尿,去隔離池丫嘛!
黃:所以我係度,趁呢個機會,同你D靚仔講呀!!
游游o下小童走o黎大人池,擒係個池邊,
唔好話我聽係學游水呀!
張:特別係擒正係噴水口個D呀!
想毀屍滅跡呀!


13.改名

改名,只係o的父母係將自己o既主觀意願套係o的仔女身上.
所以大部份女仔唔係叫美嘜就係麗嘜.
男仔唔係叫阿堅,就係阿強,一唔係就叫阿祥.
o甘我地係o米好美麗,好堅好強好長呢?


14.黑白不明

我非常欣賞鄧小平o既「黑貓白貓,捉到老鼠就是好貓.」
我老友阿雄個老婆生仔,生左個黑人出o黎,我都係o甘對佢講:
「黑仔,白仔,快高長大就係你個仔啦!」
　

15.鬧人

以前我地笑人,會話:
你有得發達?太陽由西邊出o黎呀!
依家我地就會話:
你有得發達?建築面積等如實用面積呀!
又或者話人醜,現在我地都會技巧好多:
你唔醜,你點算醜呀,你係塊面唔多實用o甘解o麻.
你o既鼻台太大,
o的眼耳口鼻o米唔見洗o羅!


16.失戀

失戀係會令人成長o既.
我失戀之前,一向都覺得世界上所有問題都有答案.
點解我地每日都要8點鐘起身返工呀?
因為夠鐘o羅!
點解我地有夠鐘呢樣o野呀?
因為我地唔用浮動上班時間o羅.
點解呢個世界有戰爭?
因為我地有武器羅.
o甘點解我地要有武器呀?
因為佢地有武器o羅.
一切都有答案,直到我失戀.
阿珍,點解你唔愛我?
阿珍比o左一個經典既答覆我,佢話:
愛情係有點解o架,係唔可以解釋o架,唔好問啦.(記緊這句啦)
如果番學阿sir問我o野都可以o甘答就好o勒!
黃子華,物体燃燒點解需要氧氣呀?
阿sir,係冇點解o架,係唔可以解釋o架,唔好問我啦!


17.隆胸

葉子微簡直為演藝界創下新標準.
以後的女仔想做明星,又唔洗睇樣,又唔洗睇演技,去磅啦!!!(加強語氣)
得入去磅一磅就得o勒.
[開黎六斤半,片酬係六千五蚊一日,小姐做唔做?]
[開黎八斤有疤痕,八千減一千疤痕費,即係7千蚊一日.]
你話幾客觀呢!


18.愛滋論

為何無人提及大陸收番香港呢?
其實即是有愛滋一樣,
你係唔係走去驗先,
我驗o左你係唔係可以醫番好我先,
唔係o架o麻,我咪唔去驗o羅,
咪當自己無o羅,如果有就等發出來咪死o羅,係咪先?(高半聲!)
同樣大陸要收番香港這問題都係o架o麻,
係唔係講下佢會唔收先,
係唔係我帶安全套佢唔收,
我見客又帶,連食飯都帶3個,
唔係啦!!(低半語)
大家來做個大o架粒住香港!!
唔係架o麻,你講唔講,
佢要收就收架啦!!
　

19.一家和一國兩制

世界上有嘜羞恥得過親娘接返個親生仔o番o黎,
然後同個仔講:
[阿仔你放心,我地一家兩制架,果個係你大佬!!]
[仆街,人地叫你呀!] (同大佬講及打大佬o既頭)
[sorry...sorry...有冇嚇親你呀,唔會發生係你身上,
我地一家兩制家麻,五十年不變!!!]
你知唔知道一國兩制最偉大既地方係嘜呀,
一國兩制最偉大o既地方就係佢地都肯認佢地自己個制真是嚇親人呀!


20.放假

黃:一般人都會好珍惜每年一度o既年假!
張:今年我要去夏威夷游o下水.
黃:如果你決定去夏威夷,你就要預忖出沉重代價!前四後六!
張:我講緊係年假,唔係產假呀,子華!(真係呀....)
黃:前四後六既意思係,係你放假之前個四個禮拜,同你放假之後六個禮拜,
都要做到仆街!(死未)因為無論你放幾耐假,你o既o野始終係你做番.
張:係你既始終係你o既!
黃:唔單止,放完假,唔係你既都會變成係你o既!


21.金勞

點解要帶金勞??
唔帶勞,有乜資格同人講,時間係寶貴?
我既時間點值錢呀?(你話係唔係先)
o拿,支時針圍住行一個圈,12個鐘,十幾皮o野,即係為皮幾o野一個鐘
你一個鐘值幾錢o丫?
幾舊水?
我點同你一齊食飯呀,大家時間觀念o甘唔同!
唔單止o甘,你帶勞,表示你個人有幽默感.
勞力士,有邊個靠勞力搵食o既人帶得起勞力士o丫?
越帶勞力士o既人就越表示佢唔洗用勞力!
呢D,就叫做幽默感o勒.


22.女愛情觀

吳:女仔對愛同鐘意有很大既分別,如果個女仔知道個男仔鐘意佢呢,
她都會同佢去o下街,睇o下戲,食o下飯,但想做進一步既野就唔得o勒.
而女仔知道個男仔愛她時係絕對可以付出更多.
在女仔心目中,鐘意等於"幫襯",鋪鋪清唔好找我更多好處,
但愛在女仔心中等於"收購",
收購包括"注資",以後"合併"......(係呀...係呀!)
所以女仔要男仔把佢o既愛注資落o黎,把護口注資落o黎,最重要o既係把錢資落o黎.
然後去買 Joyce啦,Panda 啦,Gueeo啦,買到一身都o係,
等佢認為可拱固佢自己既價值,但佢地是絕對無得倒男方o既同意架!!
o拿!!我宜家同你地講呀,你地o既黑箱作業,
很容易破壞男方o既經濟o架!!!(你們都很有共鳴o拿)


23.男愛情觀

吳:男仔對愛就很隨便,愛同鐘意都無分別,
只要佢知道妳鐘意佢,立即可帶妳番屋企,或去妳屋企,
係唔係男仔心中無愛呢?我覺得又唔係o可.
係佢地比其他人更清楚愛o既定義,
愛係乜呢?跟耶蘇既講法係:
愛係恆久忍耐又有恩賜
愛係不張狂,不大喚,不作害羞的事
忘記別人的錯.
你話o勒作為小小男人o既我地怎可隨隨便便同你講聲愛呀!!
所以以後有人同你講愛,
一就是他講大話(加強語氣),二就是有個耶蘇係你面前呀.
但耶穌主張愛人如己,博愛o架!!

　
24.自重

當乜o野人都唔搵我做o野,
我就知道,我係一個偉大o既藝術家,
在生o既時候係唔會獲得應得o既尊重.
唔止o甘,我仲偉大過偉大o既藝術家,因為我知道,
我死後都不會受到尊重.


25.紅館

依家做歌星,好犀利,因為有紅磡体育館.
因為呢樣o野,做歌星,可以o係一晚.
就賺晒你o地朝九晚五一世人都搵唔到o既錢啦!!
o的人話,我真係唔明張國榮點解要退休,(點解?)
佢一晚已經搵o左你一世搵o既野,
佢一晚已經做天你一世人要做既野,
仲有乜野可以做呀??
唔退休做乜?
做五場,已經輪迴五次!
做三十場,輪迴三十次,如來佛祖都話:洗唔洗???
的人話,唔係既,佢唔拾得退休既!佢最後個場演唱會,佢自己都o咸o架.
佢係o咸,不過唔係為自己o咸,o係為o左你o地o咸呀:
[我就退休勒,我聽日就唔洗DO勒,.你地聽日仲要番九點,唔好遲到呀!!]

　
26.迷惘

o係公司,老闆會同我講:
[你番o黎唔係訓就o係去廁所,你當呢度係屋企呀,呢度係公司呀.]
我番到屋企,阿媽又會話:
[你仲當呢到係你屋企咩,你番o黎唔係霸住個廁所就剩係識訓!]
[o甘...o甘我番屋企又唔訓覺又唔去廁所,番公司又唔去廁所唔訓,o甘我呢o的o野去邊到做呀?]
不過後o黎我諗過自己又係過份的o既,於是我就痛改前非.
以後番屋企我就剩係訓覺,番公司就剩係去廁所.
　
　
27.居安思危

董建華講o左多o野知唔知最o岩係邊句?大家知唔知呀.
最o岩就係:[我地要居安思危,居安地思想危難既時刻.]
呢句野好得意架o可,居安就思危,o甘你居危時思乜呢?
你更係更加思危架啦,o甘樣居安果時要思危,居危時又思危,
安黎做乜鬼o野呀!!?(係o米先)
我地居安就係唔想思危o架o麻,我地宜家居安都要思危,
董建華就話o左比你地各位聽:[你地安極有限啦老友!!]

　
28.老豆

我一向以為老豆,係option黎o既,附加o架o乍.
無錯,大部份人係有老豆既,
就正等如大部份既車係有收音機一樣.
但係個樣係option黎之o麻,唔係架架車都有.
所以我細個o個陣好憎o的o靚仔成日係我面前話:
[我老豆點點點.......]
我覺得o個o的人好o西命,就好似你有部車,
不停o甘同人講:
[我部車開蓬架,大包圍o架!]
你不如話:[你老豆開蓬o架,用無鉛汽油o架.....] 29.十八歲
點解十八歲先至係合法年齡呢?
因為到o左十八歲,係法律上我地就要對自己負責任
多餘,唔通十八歲之前,我地就唔洗對自己負責o羊?
唔通十八歲之前,我就可以隨時撲出馬路:
[我唔信呀,我17歲半o乍,你敢撞死我?]
唔通十八歲之,前我o係油麻地踩完個紋身佬一腳,個紋身佬會話:
[死o靚仔,你未夠十八歲,我忍你!]
[唉,十八歲既最大好處,就係你到o左一個合法既做愛年齡.]
我想請問,有邊個做愛係因為合法先做o架.
我以為大部份人做愛係為o左快感同高潮?
抑或你想話我聽,十八歲之前做愛係冇高潮o既.
十八歲之前做愛係白做既!
o甘樣十八歲就具有特別意義o勒!


30.中國古仔

每個番去大陸一定有起碼十個故事講番出o黎,
歌仔都有得唱,一首歌總括番大陸既經驗:
[十個古仔,九個係曳,淋漓盡致,嚇壞腸胃,
公安綁架,霸肚生仔,番到大陸,實會心悸,
啊亂個鬼,賤個鬼,死俾你睇,法律隨時倒轉夾硬o黎,
人人自動自覺甘心做蟻,因為馬克思你無曬問題,
因為馬克思你無曬問題!]


31.拜年

呢幾年,拜年既賀詞之中,最流行係邊句?
祝你------不勞而獲.(唔係o卦?)
恭喜人地發財當然好,但係發財,都要有方法.
有邊一個方法,好得過不勞而獲?(係o米)
不勞而獲o既方法就係唔洗方法,唔洗方法就係最好o既方法.
我地想發財,已經想到到o左一個禪o既景界!
不勞而獲既然可以成為新年賀詞,我期待係未來幾年,
我地話人蛇鼠一窩,即係讚佢合群,話人非奸即盜,即係話佢勇敢!
o華,真羨慕你呢個家庭,真係蛇鼠一窩非奸盜.
梗係,唔係我地點會陷家富貴!


32.真人對話

黃 : o個陣仲未有173呢D熱線電話,我就已經用我o既天才,
構思o左一種主動731熱線!
張 : 講乜呀?
黃 : 你依家隻手擺係邊?
你又知唔知我隻手擺係邊?
只要你話俾我知你隻手擺係邊,
我就可以估倒你o既年齡,生日同埋血型.
張 : 反應好唔好呀?
黃 : 深受一般家庭婦女歡迎!
張 : o甘o米賺好多?
黃 : 過得去啦,晚晚做到天光.
不過我到依家都唔知點收錢 .
　

33.兒童教育

我一向都認為,我地成日o厄o的細佬仔,懶係nice o甘對佢地,
講到呢個世界乜o野都好好o甘,o甘係唔o岩o既,(何解?)
細個我同媽媽搭飛機,睇見廁所既水係藍色,我未見過,
咪走去問媽媽o個o的係乜?
媽媽話:[係天空.]
所以我就成為世界上第一個食迥天空o既人.
細個的大人成日講童話講白雪公主.(你都聽過啦.!)
佢地講既就係白雪公主又靚又好人,好值得去追求.
但係冇講到我地唔係白馬王子!
邊個人至係白馬王子呀?
起碼有隻白馬啦.
o甘就即係馬主啦,你係唔係呀?
講o的唔講o的好危險o架.
即係等如你同個細路仔講:
[小明呀,飛出窗口好過引o既,成個香港望o西o架,浮下浮下.....]
但係唔同佢講:[不過你落到下個陣,會快過搭電梯好多!]


34.賭馬

喂,賭馬係需要付出好多o架.
朝早要睇晨操夜晚要睇董鏢,又要同朋友交換讀書報告.
你估我地睇得書少?市面幾多馬經呀?
仲唔係話你睇得多就得o架o咼!
香港D馬經,一埸十隻馬,十隻馬都有人貼,你自己思想唔夠獨立,
o甘你就死梗o勒:唔該,呢場每隻幫我落100蚊o丫!希望中o勒!
夏天o黎o勒,抖暑o勒,你估係比D馬休息咩?係比我地休息呀!
　

35.用家炒家

好多人結婚,最初就以為自己係婚姻o既用家.
後來先發覺自己係感情o既炒家,於是想離婚.
但係離婚又要攪幾年,睇住周街都係新盤靚盤,
自己個盤又放唔出,幾難受!